The Toths

Time Flies

2010-07-10T07:32:00.000-07:00

I have already labeled myself the worse blogger ever, so is it really any surprise that I haven't posted anything in several months.? We are so busy, and I feel guilty sitting at the computer updating things when I should be doing something that is actually useful. So, I am shooting for once montly updates.

Andy has had one more episode of epiglottitis requiring a late night trip to the ER. He didn't respond as quickly as we hoped to the epinephrine, so we spent the night in observation. This one was precipitated by strep pharyngitis. It has been about 5 weeks since that last visit, and it appears that we are slowly spreading them out. Instead of once or twice every month, we have gone up to 6 weeks! We saw another specialist, this time a pulmonologist, who basically said the same thing as the otorhinolaryngologist: Andy will grow out of the subglottic stenosis when he is between 2-5 years old. We are hoping for the 2 year old mark.

At Andy's most recent doctor visit, he weighed 27lbs and was 33.5inches tall. He has grown 6 inches since his one year visit! Does it hurt to grow that fast? His feet are ridiculuous; we are on the fourth size since he came home in October. And they are like blocks, very thick. Not all shoes will fit his "tall" feet.

We finalized Andy's adoption on June 1st. Fabulous day.

Coby and I do other things besides gaze in wonder at Andy. Coby was involved in live burn training in late May, where fire departments from all over the country come to train with OKC Fire. It's probably not something you know, but OKC has a reputation for safety and has one of the busiest firehouses in the country (located at SW 59th and May). So other cities send their firefighters here for training. OKC is unique in that they have a wide variety of fires that they regularly fight, from grass fires to small house fires to large building fires. Additionally, they have several oil/gas type of fires every year. And with all the rain recently, his recent dive training was also put to use. I'm a little proud of Coby, but just a little.

I'm busy, busy, busy at work. People often ask me what I think about the changes in health care. The short version: it has the potential to be disasterous, forcing many primary care physicians to quit taking medicare or just quit completely. We have already felt the crunch of the temporary 21% paycut in medicare reimbursement (think of your salary cut by 1/4). Thankfully, Congress repealed the paycut, but only for 6 months. The amount of paperwork required by insurance companies is overwhelming, and I am tired of them telling me how to treat my patients. I have often wondered if I should have gone into another specialty, such as dermatology or radiology. But I would have been BORED. I love the essence of my job; I love that I take care of newborns, their parents and grandparents, too. I am beginning to loathe the red tape. Oh, and there is that pesky threat of litigation always in the back of my head...

Croup, again

2010-03-16T04:31:00.000-07:00

We are anxiously awaiting the day that we don't have to go to the ER every time that Andy gets a croup-like illness. He can't grow out of his subglottic stenosis fast enough!

But overall, we are all doing well. Andy is a stacking genius, loves the vacuum, and wants to climb on everything.

I'm the worst blogger ever. I still can't bring myself to write about the everyday stuff.

Walking

2010-02-10T18:07:00.001-08:00

It's official, we are walking everywhere now.

Snow

2010-01-29T14:00:00.000-08:00

It seems like it has snowed &/or iced a lot this winter in OKC. Coby can pretty much drive anywhere in this stuff, which is nice. It's funny how he will jump at the chance to go get milk or TP when it means he can put the Jeep in 4WD.

Andy was recently hospitalized with RSV. We spent three days in the PICU, then another three days in a regular room. He was bored towards the end, but overall he was so good while hospitalized. He continues to amaze us with his ability to adapt to whatever situation he is in! I think Coby and I were more frustrated with staying in that small room than he was.

We met with our adoption attorney this week, who happens to have two children from S. Korea. We can't finalize the adoption until April, but we met with her to start gathering documents. So when the six month mark comes around, everything will be ready, and she can submit it to the court. Then we get a court date, stand in front of the judge and declare that we intend to support, love, etc... Andy forever amd make him part of our family. The judge OKs everything, and our adoption is done! It is at that time that we can legally change his name and get a birth certificate and certificate of citizenship. While we are calling him Andy, his legal name is still Hyeon Bhin Jeong. One of the quirks of this whole thing is that we already received a social security number and card in his legal name. We never applied for it; it came about one week after his green card arrived. According to everyone we have talked to, this is unusual. Hopefully, it won't cause us issues later on when we need to get another one with his new name.

We purchased a lot to eventually build a house. We picked out the house plans over three years ago; we would like to pay off as much of the lot as possible before we build, so it may be another year before we get started. Our builder is estimating it will take one year to build. So, we will be here for awhile. The lot is beautiful, 1.3 acres with lots of trees.

Anyway, life is good around the Toth house.

OMG!

2010-01-16T18:03:00.000-08:00

I think it's funny that most societies have "bad words". What group of people decided that certain words are taboo? I don't go around sounding like a marine-sailor hybrid, but the occasional "bad word" has escaped me. The same people who think it is just so wrong to say these words are the same ones who use words like bootylicious, use FACEBOOK or TWEET as a verb, or use the phrase LOL when they aren't texting (I don't even like it in a text. If I can't tell you are being funny, well, then you're not). That's just poor grammar and lack of creativity on their part. But, I guess you could argue that saying a curse word when you are frustrated is also lack of creativity.

Whatever.

Scout, 2000-2010

2010-01-09T15:03:00.000-08:00

We love you, sweet girl.

Christmas

2009-12-27T18:28:00.000-08:00

We had a wonderful Christmas, despite the last minute change in plans. We were supposed to go to Bartlesville to spend Christmas with Coby's parents, but the Blizzard of '09 forced us to stay here. So we went to my parent's house and had a leisurely Christmas afternoon. We will likely go to Bartlesville next weekend for a late holiday.

Andy started a new crawl/walk two days ago. We are calling it "The Crab". He is so close to walking, taking three steps today. I am torn about this latest development. He is so cute when he is crawling, and I am not sure how we are going to keep up with him once he walks. But, it seems inevitable that this milestone will soon be passed.

Worst blogger updater ever

2009-12-18T04:25:00.000-08:00

I'm not very good at this blogging thing. One, I don't remember to do it often, or I don't have much time. Two, I don't think most people care about the mundane things that occur in our lives. Not that I think our lives are boring-I like things calm and predictable, so our "ordinary" life is fine with me. So all you get today are some pictures of Andy, which is what most people want to see anyway. The first one looks like he is upset; I caught the moment right before he smiles. And in the second picture, he looks like he needs to be powdered. Andy has very mild eczema, so we slather him with cetaphil after a bath and use aquaphor on his face, which leaves him a little shiny. That plus the ever present drool will make you reflect light like a beacon. But, the cetaphil-aquaphor combo works great to keep his eczema away.

2009-12-09T18:43:00.000-08:00

The ball pit is the best $30 we have spent. Andy LOVES it.

Not enough hours in the day

2009-12-07T04:15:00.000-08:00

I always knew that juggling a career, marriage, and motherhood would be difficult.

It is so much more difficult that I imagined.

I feel like I start everyday already behind in most of those categories. And it's not that I lack time management skills (which could be better, but by necessity, I don't really waste a lot of time. Except for right now).

It's the emotional part of it. Something or someone always gets left out: my patients, Coby, Andy, parents, friends. And carving out time for yourself is doubly hard. At the end of the day, I am frustrated with what I didn't get done, which just adds more to the to-do list for the next day.

Will I ever catch up?

And don't let this post fool you-I wouldn't change my life for anything. Even more free time. I just have to learn to reorganize my priorities and create a shorter to-do list. I've been a parent for only 8 weeks, so I feel like I am still learning how to juggle life. And it is getting easier...I think.

Scout

2009-11-27T10:34:00.000-08:00

Our sweet 9 year-old Boxer, Scout, is sick.

She has been slowly losing weight over the past 6 months, but it seems to have accelerated recently. She has never been overweight, always weighing in around 60lbs. But she is now 50lbs, almost 20% of her bodyweight lost! Her appetite, activity level, temperment, etc... is the same. Nothing unusual going on except the weight loss. Coby and I put off the vet appointment for at least one month, because we knew it couldn't be good news. The beginning of the end of our other Boxer, Oscar, started the same way. All lab work is okay, but her xrays show two large tumors on her heart. The vet says they are likely hemangiosarcomas, a malignant cancer seen in Boxers, especially on the heart. There is no treatment. So she is now on prednisone twice daily to help with inflammation and hopefully slow the weight loss. She is such a sweet girl, and I don't know what we will do without her.

ORL visit

2009-11-18T18:17:00.000-08:00

We took Andy to a pediatric ORL specialist this week. He confirmed what we thought was going on, saying that he looks great and should grow out of his "loud breathing" without any long-term issues. Yea!

He is enjoying the limited amount of daycare he has attended, although he cries for a couple of minutes when we leave. He is definitely attached to Coby!

Life is good. Only complaint is there are not enough hours in the day.

Andy's 1st Birthday

2009-11-15T05:15:00.000-08:00

Andy had is one year-old pictures on Friday. He was amazing during the photo shoot, just smiling and playing. He can be so patient! I'm sure Coby, my mother-in-law, and I looked completely ridiculous trying to make him smile. But it worked, and we have great pictures to show for it.

My favorite photos from the day.

For the Christmas card (I can't believe I actually convinced Coby to do this...parenting does change a person, I guess):

We had a great time yesterday celebrating Andy's 1st birthday with friends and family. We got Andy his own cake, which he was very interesting in playing with, not so much with eating it. It was basically like fingerpaint for him. He scored some really neat toys and cute clothes. I have no idea where we will put all this stuff, especially since Christmas is next month. Maybe it's time to start building that house??

Tracheomalacia

2009-11-09T13:14:00.000-08:00

What is that, you might ask?

It is the answer to what ails our Andy.

The last post details our bout with Croup (which is still the devil). Andy has also had three prior hospitalizations for bronchiolitis. We assumed he had asthma, so we started pulmicort last week with albuterol treatments when he wheezed.

But something strange was happening. The albuterol did nothing. NOTHING. We were holding him down for these nebulized treatments for no perceived benefit. And Coby and I would listen to him, and we had been saying to each other that it sounded like the wheezing was coming from his upper airways, not really in his lungs. But with babies, it can be difficult to tell what part of the airway is making noise.

Then it all clicked into place yesterday. Prematurity + multiple hospitalizations for lung infections + almost daily "noisy breathing but not quite wheezing" = tracheomalacia. It is when the muscles that surround the trachea are not as strong as they should be, so they are floppy. Babies will breathe loudly, wheezing a lot of the time. These noises are made as air is inhaled or exhaled, vibrating the floppy muscles. But the baby is fine and happy, despite what sounds like a respiratory problem. And it is usually self-limiting, so no therapy is needed. He should grow out of it sometime this year.

So he doesn't have a lung problem so much as a trachea problem. We are hopeful that it is mild, as he doesn't have the other issues that can arise with severe tracheomalacia, such as poor weight gain, cyanotic spells, or reflux. Which means we can stop the pulmicort for now, as well as the liquid steroid and albuterol.

You would think I could have figured this out sooner. It only took 9 days and a dozen doctors' opinions (seriously, at least a dozen...most of my friends are doctors) for us to figure this out.

Croup is the devil

2009-11-06T13:02:00.000-08:00

We took Andy to the ER on Sunday. He had woken up in the middle of the night, which is unusual for him. He had a temperature of 100.7, so I gave him tylenol and some water. He quickly fell back asleep within 15 minutes. He woke up feeling okay, playful and happy, and ate a normal breakfast. Within two hours, he was coughing and had a runny nose. We listened to him with the stethoscope and checked his oxygenation (the benefits of having a doctor and a fireman for parents). His ears looked okay. And he is still smiling.

And then things went downhill quickly. When he started having respiratory retractions, we took him to Children's Hospital. It takes less than 15 minutes to get there from our house; that was enough time for him to develop the stidor typical of croup. When the triage nurse saw him, we skipped the admissions part and went straight to a room. Within five minutes of arriving at the ER, he was fighting a nebulized racemic epinephrine treatment. His heart rate was 220, respiratory rate 60, temperature 100.5. It took less than 10 minutes for the treatment to take effect. But we were back to the same respiratory distress an hour later. So we held him down for another round of epinephrine. And then we were admitted for observation.

He did better overnight, needing only one more nebulizer treatment. No more fevers, his heart rate and respiratory rate improved, and he slept off and on. We have now been home for 5 days, and while he has not deteriorated to the point of needing epinephrine again, he is slow to recover. We are certain that he has asthma, so he has started daily asthma medication. It's super fun to hold you child down on a daily basis so that he can receive his inhaled medicine. Good times.

We are so thankful that he has the personality he does. Even when ill, he still is easy-going; he makes us look like better parents than we are.

2009-10-25T14:35:00.000-07:00

I go back to work this next week, and I will miss seeing my boys all day! I am excited to go back, yet sad at the same time. It's only part-time for about a month, then back to full time.

Andy had a trial run at daycare last week, staying for about 4 hours. There were no tears when we left, none while he was there the entire time! They said he was a sweet boy, was happy and smiling the entire time except for right before his nap. And he ate well (no big surprise). He won't go to daycare full time for awhile, but we thought we would try a mini-day when we were both around. We feel better about the whole thing seeing how well he did.

It's amazing how well Andy adapts. I think his foster family would be amazed to learn that he sleeps 11 hours at night without needing a bottle (he was being fed a bottle 2-3 times/night) and takes two naps every day. I don't think this has a lot to do with our parenting skills. We think Andy is just a low-key, no fuss kid who acclimates well to his surroundings. The transition to milk was super easy; next comes the cup. We are so lucky!

11 hours

2009-10-20T11:47:00.000-07:00

Andy has finally adjusting to the time difference. He has now slept for 11 hours at night for the past two nights! He is happier when he sleeps, as are Coby and I. We are still trying to figure out the nap schedule, but things are getting better every day. It's amazing how quickly he has dominated our lives. It seems like every room has something of Andy's in it. I go back to work in one week, which will be hard, but at least it is part-time for awhile.

In one week, we have already seen several changes in Andy. He is much more mobile now, crawling everywhere. He was held so much in Korea, and we don't think he was given as much time to simply play on the floor. And he loves it! He also waves to everyone and claps all the time. We don't know if he was "in shock" last week (or maybe we were in shock), but we just noticed these things the past 2-3 days.

Thanks to my parents and Coby's parents-they have been lifesavers this past week. We really appreciate your help and support.

Coby and I are still new at this video thing, so hopefully, the quality will get better as we become more practiced. But here is a small sample of our night: he crawls all over, we follow behind. The dogs love him, especially Cub. And he is fascinated with Porkchop, who hasn't really wanted to officially meet him yet.

Adjustments

2009-10-16T00:08:00.000-07:00

Last night was very difficult for all of us. Not only does Andy have to adjust to a new time zone (Korea is 14 hours ahead), but he has new parents, foods, sounds, smells, etc... And he has lost a wonderful foster family. Last night he cried for about 4 hours. There was nothing Coby or I could do for him to make him feel better. So we just lay on the floor with him scooting between the two of us. He didn't want us to hold him, but he got even more upset when we left him. It was so sad to see him so upset. We think he is grieving for his foster family. He slept with his foster mother, and now he sleeps by himself. Prior to this, he was doing well in the crib for naps, crying for less than 3 minutes before he went to sleep. We know this change will be slow, and I hope he can be as happy at night as he is during the day.

He loves food! He smiles and gets very excited to get into his highchair. And he will eat anything, no pickiness. He also loves the bath, splashing around and crying when we try to take him out.

We are still learning about each other, but overall, I think the past two days have gone well.

Getting ready to leave

2009-10-12T00:02:00.000-07:00

Coby and I have had an amazing week in Seoul. We are so fortunate to be here and meet the people that have taken care of Andy since he was 4 weeks old. His foster family will never be forgotten, and I hope to keep in touch with them.

We spent more time with Andy today. He was discharged from the hospital this morning and brought to Eastern. We got to play with him for about an hour before he had to go home. He is still coughing a little, sounds wheezy at times. He will be on a liquid steroid for about one week. But none of this slows him down! He crawls super fast and pulls up to standing really quickly. He is very active, constantly looking for a new toy to play with. He lets us hold him, and he will sit in our laps to play. And no crying when the foster family left for awhile to leave us alone with him! I am anxious about the flight back because he is very active. I have no idea how we will keep him occupied for 12 hours. I feel sorry for the people around us, because I think it may be a loud flight!

We are ready to come home and be with our families. We have tons of pictures to share when we get back.

Korea update

2009-10-08T12:12:00.000-07:00

We met Andy! Let's just say that yesterday morning was one of the best of our lives. Very emotional, funny, happy. More details later when we have more time.

Our first meeting was great, but a little different than expected. The night before we saw him, we got a phone call from our case worker at Dillon (who happens to be in Korea as well). She was calling to tell us Andy was in the hospital for a viral illness. We worried all night that this would delay him coming home. Then we saw him and spoke with his doctor at the hospital. He is getting steroids for bronchiolitis, a common viral illness in the lungs. If he were in the USA, he would not even be in the hospital. We saw some of the healthiest looking kids at the Korean Children's Hospital! And Coby was very popular with the little girls-they were fascinated with his bald head! So, he looks great, is eating well. They are going to keep him over the weekend just to make sure he gets enough steroids. He will be on a liquid steroid for awhile when he gets home. The doctor was great!

More posts to follow about Seoul and the wonderful people here. We can't say enough about Korean hospitality.

Cool Daddy

2009-10-03T16:38:00.000-07:00

Coby is modeling the latest daddy gear:

This carrier won't last very long, as it holds babies up to 30lbs, and Andy is 23lbs already. But, it will come in handy at the airport. We will each have a suitcase and a carry-on (or two), which doesn't leave us any spare hands.

And thanks to Little Steph's & Shelly's mom for the teddy bear. It's been Andy's stunt double for the past couple of months.

Korea!

2009-09-29T07:27:00.001-07:00

WE'RE GOING TO KOREA NEXT WEEK!

I just found out, and I am now totally useless at work!

Feeling better

2009-09-28T16:45:00.000-07:00

I was really hoping to be in S. Korea on my birthday, but obviously that didn't work out. I spent most of last week waiting for news that never came, then feeling really blue that it didn't. My mood is better this week; I know that we are going soon, but this wait is dreadful!

Coby is the best husband I could ask for. Just trust me.

Here's a picture of the beautiful blue topaz ring Coby gave me for my birthday. Topaz is Andy's birthstone. I think I'm getting a little obsessed with David Yurman jewelry.

Here are a couple of shots of the dogs and Porkchop over the weekend. I sometimes wish I could live for one day like they do.

Cub, looking mighty fine.

Biscuit with her favorite toy that she has had

since Christmas.

All four of "the babies": Biscuit and Scout sharing

the back bed; Cub and Porkchop on the front bed.

A dark place

2009-09-23T16:40:00.000-07:00

I'm blue.

No news today.

Nothing else to say.

Knots

2009-09-23T03:59:00.000-07:00

I couldn't sleep last night.

Every time we have found out anything about Andy, from the initial referral to his passport, it has been on a Wednesday. It has now been two weeks since his passport was issued, so I am hopeful to hear once again from Mary Anne at Dillon. We were told travel clearance usually takes 2-4 weeks; I am hopeful it is today!

My stomach is knotted up, I can't focus, can't sleep, can't eat. I feel like if this day ends without any information, we will have to wait another week.

Unacceptable!

Update

2009-09-16T18:13:00.000-07:00

We received another update from Eastern about Andy. He went for his 10mos check up, and he now weighs 22.5lbs and is 28 inches long, which puts him at the 50th and 10th percentile for weight and length. It sounds like he is shaped like a pumpkin with a head and feet!

He is crawling well and pulling up to a stand. He is standing alone and walks with support. He has four teeth and can say four words. Some of his favorite foods are yogurt, cheese, and peaches.

I CAN'T WAIT!

Thank goodness I have a tech-savy brother

2009-09-09T18:56:00.000-07:00

My brother, Andy, was able to upload the video of our Andy to youtube. It was in a format that I was not familiar with, so he took the DVD and converted it.

http://www.youtube.com/user/warrentowe

He is about 6 1/2 months old here. He is sitting on his foster mom's lap; the social worker is the lady on the left. They are opening a small gift we were able to send over in a couple of months ago.

How cute are his socks!?

More good news

2009-09-09T14:58:00.000-07:00

WE HAVE A PASSPORT!

It could still be up to 4 MORE WEEKS (ouch!!) until we get travel clearance. Hopefully, since he is healthy with no major issues, this will go quickly and we will be on our way by the first week of October. But all legal paperwork is completed.

I can't wait!

Two weeks=eternity

2009-09-07T17:03:00.000-07:00

It will be two weeks tomorrow from when we found out about emigration permission. We were told it usually takes 1-2 weeks for a passport. I'm not holding my breath or anything...

A guilty face

2009-09-04T02:42:00.000-07:00

Cub has done something bad. I haven't figured out what he has done, but it is only a matter of time before I find a magazine/book that has been eaten, a food item missing, etc...

When I got home from work yesterday, Cub didn't meet me at the door. Usually he is so excited when people come home that he stands so close to the door you can't open it. And he avoided eye contact. He finally came over to me after being home for about 15 minutes.

You might have hidden the evidence, Cub, but your conscience is ratting you out!

Soon-to-be-mom stuff

2009-09-02T13:12:00.000-07:00

Not much going on around here. I am already planning our trip to S. Korea by making endless lists of things to pack, do, bring... As for the diaper bag for the trip home, I need help! If you wouldn't mind looking over the list of things I have included and telling me what I have left off, that would be great. Here goes:

15 diapers + wipes + diaper changing pad
infant tylenol
PJs
socks
three changes of clothes
spoon
two covered plastic bowels
two sippy cups
one bottle (We don't know if he has transitioned to sippy cups, so I packed both)
an array of nipples in different sizes
blanket
two toys (one musical, one kinda quiet)
two large ziplocs for storing dirty stuff
pacifier

We will be stuck on airplanes or in airports for 18-22 hours! Any guidance is appreciated.

woo-hoo

2009-08-25T16:26:00.001-07:00

We received emigration permission today! I feel like we won the lottery. When I picked up the phone to call Coby at work, my hands were shaking. If I am this excited about EP, I am going to be hysterical when we actually see Andy.

The next step is a passport, which will hopefully be issued in 1-2 weeks.

Yippee!

Am I looosing my senses?

2009-08-25T10:05:00.000-07:00

I am about to lose it. Actually, I came close to it last week when I almost starting crying in clinic. The proverbial straw, you might ask?? Well, it was a very nice nurse asking me how the adoption process is going. I'm am just not dealing well with the stress of waiting for Andy to come home. Every day I look at other people's adoption timelines to try to figure out what ours will be. At this point, I think we are still at least one month away from seeing Andy's sweet face. We still need emigration permission (EP), passport issued (PP), and travel clearance (TC). Once he gets EP, the PP is about 7-10 days later with TC 7-10 days after that. And then we have to make our travel plans. So even if we found out TODAY that he has EP, we are looking at 3-4 weeks until we can go, minimum. Arrgg!

And the title? A random Friends reference from Ross.

What would Freud think?

2009-08-22T06:26:00.000-07:00

I have this recurring dream where I am married to my ex-boyfriend from college. I'm very sad through the whole thing. I'm actually more than sad, I'm desperate and depressed. I keep asking myself, "why didn't I marry Coby? I don't understand.". Then I wake up and all is right in the world. I have this dream probably once every month. Weird.

I had another recurring dream as a kid; we were moving to a new house, and there were boxes and stuff everywhere, inside and out. I was outside playing when a big shadow covers our house. I look up at the green belly of a dinosaur. It waves at me, reaches into our garage and opens the fridge door. Dino then takes a Coke and walks away. I keep on playing. It seems like I had this dream a hundred times.

Ya'll got any weird ones?

When ignorance isn't bliss

2009-08-16T08:21:00.001-07:00

Since Coby and I have decided to adopt, many people have asked us, Why?". This is a natural curiosity, and I understand that. I have no problems answering that question for our close friends and family. But for people I just met, I tell them it's the way we have decided to have children. For most people, this is acceptable, and they get the hint.

However, I have met many people who don't stop there. Here's a sample of what I have heard over the past 1 1/2 years (and how I wish I could respond out loud):

"How sad you can't have your own children."

Yeah, b/c Andy is really someone else's child and he is just "on loan".

"What's wrong with you? with your husband?"

Are you stupid or just rude?

"I think it's ridiculous that people are going to foreign countries when there are so many kids here that need homes. Why not adopt an American kid?"

If that's the way you feel, then why don't YOU adopt domestically?

"Well maybe one day you will have kids of your own."

Please see response to stupid remark #1.

"Are you going to tell him he's adopted?"

Seriously, someone asked me this, even after I showed them a picture of Andy. Despite the fact that his current hairstyle resembles Coby's, I'm pretty sure this is a no-brainer. I don't think we've ever been mistaken for Asian people.

"Wow, you must have a lot of extra money."

Usually my blank stare makes people feel uncomfortable enough that they move onto another topic quickly. Silence can be amazing when dealing with ignorant people.

One lady even implied that I will never know what true, sacrificial love is really about since I will only have adopted children. I think she was also the recipient of an uncomfortably long, silent stare (or maybe glare).

None of these questions have been asked by friends or family members, only by acquaintances or people I have recently met. My friends and family may think these things, but at least they have enough of an internal check system that they don't say them out loud.

Cloud Nine

2009-08-09T09:05:00.000-07:00

Coby, mom, dad, and me had our own version of "Trips on a Tankful" yesterday. First, we started with lunch at a locally owned restaurant in Shawnee called Benedict Street Market. Very cute with great food. The use only locally raised, hormone-free meats and make all their own breads and baked goods. The rye was so good mom bought a loaf to take home. Then we drove to Holdenville to a bakery called Kalico Kitchen. Holy cow, good stuff! They have all sorts of cookies, pies, cakes, and homemade custard. We all fell in love with the Cloud Nine Cookies. I've never had anything like it before, and it makes the drive worth it. Then Coby and I watched the Cardinals beat the Pirates...a perfect Saturday.

Thoughts of a physician fresh out of residency

2009-08-07T18:41:00.001-07:00

Here are a few musings after my first two weeks in private practice:

1. Show up a couple of minutes early or at least on time.

2. If you are a new patient, show up about 15-20 minutes before your appointment. You will need to have your insurance verified and fill out new patient paperwork.

3. We never intend to run late. I promise you that we don't meet every day to figure out the best way to upset our patients. If you follow rules #1 and #2, it will help us avoid running late.

4. While it is helpful to have a list of questions for the doctor, do not expect us to take care of ten problems in 15-20 minutes. It simply can't happen. Expect three issues AT THE MOST to be discussed at one visit.

5. It is much easier on us and our staff if you don't wait until the last minute to get medications refilled. Give your doctor's office about one week to get refills done. And don't expect anything to be completed after 4pm on Friday afternoon. Doctors and nurses are just as anxious as you are to get home for the weekend.

6. Doctors do not get reimbursed for all the paperwork we do. All the requests we get for FMLA, powered scooters, refills, prior authorizations, home health orders, etc... are to be done on our own time, either between patients, at lunch, or at the end of the day. You would never go to an attorney and ask them to draft a will, power of attorney, etc... for free. But that is exactly what we do. So it may take more than 24 hours to get your FMLA paperwork back to you. There are only so many hours in a day (and again, we like to eventually go home).

7. Contrary to what most people think, a majority of doctors make LESS money today than they did ten years ago. Yet it costs more to run a business today. To make up for this deficit, we must see a large volume of patients. If you feel as though you are just herded through the doctor's office and nobody really listens to you, call your congressman to discuss reimbursement to primary care physicians. If we support primary care better (by this, I mean pediatrics, internal medicine, OB-GYN, and family medicine), your doctor will not have to see as many patients to be able to pay the bills. Not seeing as many patients=more time spent with you.

This is not intended as a rant, just a heads-up. I LOVE what I do, and I was aware of these obstacles when I decided to go into medicine. I'm sure there will be more tidbits, and please feel free to leave me your comments for ways you think healthcare can be improved.

Seen any porcupines lately?

2009-08-05T09:00:00.000-07:00

I haven't actually seen a porcupine, but I know that one lurks in Cleveland Neighborhood.

I woke up early this morning to workout. Biscuit, who normally is a very chipper puppy in the morning, hears that I am awake and comes down the hall to say hi. She is her usual happy self, wagging her tail and making soft happy-snorty noises. As my eyes adjust to the light in the hall and bathroom, I notice that she has slender white spikes poking out of her muzzle.

What on earth is that?

She gets closer to me, and I then realize that she has what appears to be porcupine quills all over her face!

Are you kidding me? I go in to tell Coby I need help.

C: What's going on?
S: Biscuit got smacked by a porcupine and now has the quills stuck in her face.
C: Are you serious? We don't have a porcupine...that doesn't make sense (remember, it's 4am, and nothing is really making sense at this point).
S: Well, it's either a porcupine or a hedgehog. And neither one of those makes any sense.

Let me emphasize that Biscuit is now estatic that both of us are awake at 4:30am. Her entire body is now wagging. She really is a "morning person". Oh, and Cub and Scout are completely oblivious to what's going on-both are still asleep.

We can't pull these things out; not only are there too many of them, she has several in her tongue! If you've ever seen Biscuit, you know that her tongue doesn't really fit in her mouth. So we put her in the car and drive to the all-night vet down the street.

When we walk in the door, the vet techs can barely contain their muffled laughter. They take Biscuit to the back for the vet to assess her. If she doesn't tolerate the removal well, then they will have to sedate her. Thankfully, Biscuit's winning personality and overall joy in life perserveres, and she continues to wag her tail all through the quill extraction. Ten minutes and $116 later, Biscuit is returned to us, quill-less. They even waived the after-hours fee b/c of how easy going she was during the procedure.

One of the quills broke off and is imbedded below her nose, so she has to take one week's worth of antibiotics to help prevent infection. And she's also acting a little weird after getting a pain shot. And by weird I mean standing in one position for about 30 minutes. I offered her a treat when we got home-she put it in her mouth, and it was still there when I left for work over one hour later.

How was your morning?

no news

2009-08-03T16:12:00.000-07:00

The cliche " No news is good news" is a big bunch of hooey.

No news is exactly where we stand on Andy. Coby and I are about to go crazy waiting for any information. We were told paperwork processing may be slower in the summer b/c of increased travel, but that doesn't really make it any better.

I love the hybrid.

I am working on a list of things to do/not to do at the doctor's office, so check back soon.

2009-07-27T19:22:00.000-07:00

Well here it is:
My Ford Escape Hybrid. I am psyched about 34mpg! I really loved the Xterra, but this seems like the best move for right now.

And thank you to Coby, an understanding and indulgent husband.

2009-07-26T07:07:00.000-07:00

I am seriously considering trading in my Xterra for a Ford Escape Hybrid. Now that I drive at least 80 miles daily in my commute to work, the gas mileage issue is more important. We would save over $150 in gas expenses per month, but my car payment would also go up about $150. When you factor in insurance, I'm not convinced the total monthly cost of the Ford is any less than the Xterra. But somehow, paying less at the pump just feels better. And going with an even more fuel efficient vehicle, such as a Prius or Camry (which actually costs more than an SUV!), is not really an option-we need the space of the SUV.

And who am I kidding, anyway. Once I drove the Ford around over the weekend, I was hooked.

So I am buying one on Monday. Pictures to follow.

Blah, blah

2009-07-17T17:54:00.000-07:00

Not much really going on around here. It's way too hot outside.

I started my new job this week, but I can't start seeing patients until Medicare has officially blessed my credentials. And that could take two more weeks. So, my days are spent trying to look busy, learning the electronic medical record, trying to remember everyone's name, and not getting lost in the building and/or parking lot. As of this afternoon, I now have a parking spot with my name on it, so that should take care of at least one issue. And the PR person at our clinic has booked many half-day's worth of activities such as a chamber of commerce luncheon, tours of the nursing homes, and doing sports physicals for Shawnee's school system.

Our new clinic building is looking beautiful and should be open October 1st. I am super excited (and lucky) to have a modern, clean, and updated place to work. It's all wireless, paperless, and other fancy terms I don't understand. Basically, the days of an old fashioned medical chart are over; computer only at the new clinic.

No further news on Andy at this time. Coby and I are anxiously awaiting notification from Dillon that he has travel clearance. Can't wait!

Shower time!

2009-07-12T13:12:00.000-07:00

My aunt and cousin hosted a baby shower for us yesterday, and it was loads of fun. We came home with quite the haul of gifts, including a highchair, stroller, car seat, lots of books, and many other things. I really want to thank two sweet friends of mine from college for driving in from Houston and Woodward-it means a lot to Coby & me that ya'll came. We have assembled everything that needed it, and Andy's room is already getting very full.

This was the cake, made by a bakery in NW OKC. Firetrucks were everywhere at the party!

A long-time friend of the family made this blanket and pillow case. It looks great in his room.

And the best part of the day was receiving a DVD of Andy with his foster mom and social worker. They were opening the gifts Coby & I sent him last month. He is so cute! We are very thankful for the family he lives with in S. Korea as it is obvious that he is loved. I'm working on getting the DVD posted, so check back later.

Happy Anniversary...

2009-07-06T17:08:00.000-07:00

...to my parents! 35 years and counting.

Adoption paperwork seems to be moving along quickly. Two weeks ago we received notification from the Department of Homeland Security that our petition to classify Andy as an immediate relative was approved and forwarded to South Korea. Today we received notice from the Visa section of the Department of State that all of our paperwork has been sent to S. Korea. The only thing left to do is wait for S. Korea to issue the Visa and passport. When this is near completion, we will have about 2-4 weeks notice before we can travel. Our adoption agency, Dillon International, is wonderful. They have made paperwork a breeze.

We are very anxious to travel for many reasons: we have never flown that far away, the situation in N. Korea is kinda tenuous, and most of all, we simply want Andy here ASAP. I need to compile a list of questions to ask our social worker, Kim, about what to bring. The weather is similar to Oklahoma, maybe a little milder. We are imposing self-limitations of one suitcase & one carry-on each. I am usually a light packer, but this may be difficult b/c of the gifts we want to bring with us. I can't wait to go!

2009-06-30T08:39:00.000-07:00

While at work today, we all started sharing war stories about the things our animals have eaten. It made me think, why, why do we put up with this behavior? So here is a list of the things that have been consumed in our house over the past decade:

1. one bag of fertilizer
2. 4lbs of raw chicken
3. 19 (19!) Krispy Kreme donuts
4. two Krispy Kreme donut boxes
5. countless loaves of bread
6. one passport
7. one datebook
8. at least three library books
9. many magazines
10. several bags of hershey kisses
11. 2 1/2 sofa cushions (not just pillows, but actual sofa cushions)
12. my mother-in-law's outdoor blinds (very expensive treat. Thanks, Scout)
13. drywall
14. 5 pairs of shoes
15. a memory foam mattress topper
16. the corners of the steps on the deck
17. Brad Barnes' glasses
18. Coby's glasses
19. one Cox Cable remote

Despite all this, we still have three dogs and one cat!

Andy update

2009-06-25T12:11:00.001-07:00

Here is the newest photo we have of Andy (with his foster mom). Evidently he is quite the little flirt; his social worker and foster mom say he is popular in the neighborhood. We can't wait to see him!

We received notice from the Dept. of Homeland Security that his visa has been approved for entry to the U.S. We are now waiting for this visa as well as his passport-both have to be issued from S. Korea. And we are hoping that Kim Jong-il doesn't blow up that part of the world anytime soon, as we really don't want anything to delay our travel.

Happy Father's Day

2009-06-21T08:49:00.000-07:00

Happy Father's Day, Dad!

I am very lucky to have such supportive, funny, loving parents.

Life's lessons

2009-06-19T10:11:00.000-07:00

Lessons from kindergarten that we should all still follow:

1. Share.

2. Play nice.

3. Say please and thank you.

4. Naps are good for you.

5. Respect your elders.

Is that so hard?

One of the first things I saw when I woke up this morning:

That's Porkchop and Cub, sharing a bed.

Since I am asked this question daily, our adoption story is coming up soon.

Here's a picture of Andy to whet your appetite:

2009-06-18T18:34:00.001-07:00

So I finally got my new passport over the weekend.

I had to get a new one b/c the old one looked like this:

The joys of having three dogs are endless.

What...

2009-06-18T10:33:00.000-07:00

...am I thinking? I don't have time to do this. And the time I devote to this I probably should be devoting to something else. So don't expect multiple daily posts, or even one daily post.

Here's the quick version of us:

Coby: OKC firefighter, husband, martial arts devotee, soon-to-be father

Stephanie: physician, wife, voracious reader, soon-to-be mother

Atticus Andrew: our son, arrival TBA

Scout, Porkchop, Biscuit, Cub: the animal menagerie